Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
