ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
