Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Randomize
