Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
