Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
