oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
