if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
thus making me awesome and them whores
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
