yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize