It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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