Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize