??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Randomize
