yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
