apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
