just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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