Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
