remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
