so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Boobs are out for the taking
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Randomize
