hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
