It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Randomize
