Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize