I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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