God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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