Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Randomize
