I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
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