youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
