she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
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