how can u be prego again
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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