and she was petting her beer can
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
