yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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