ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Is Oprah even human
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
why does every cop we meet know your name?
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
