So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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