I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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