OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
