I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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