She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
