Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
