You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
