Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
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