thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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