i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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