This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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