Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
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