the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
