if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
no you cant smoke seaweed
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
