I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Randomize
