Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize