i think my mom watched the whole time
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Randomize
