Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize