I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
