Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
