I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
