Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
